Good listening is more than what words you use when listening. Using these techniques, the listener feels validated and supported without being judged.
These statements pull together ideas and facts, as well as establish a basis for further understanding.Įxamples: "Mmm." "Yes." "Right." "Certainly." Try asking questions that will help the speaker arrive at his or her own conclusions.Įxamples: "How?" "What?" "Could?" "Would?" "Is?" "Are?" "Do?" "Did?" Give the speaker an opportunity to think about the question before he or she responds. The listener waits until the speaker has finished speaking and repeats the content of what he or she has heard in his or her own words.Įxamples: "In other words, it is your decision to." "These seem to be the key ideas you have expressed." The listener makes a statement labeling the feeling he or she heard.Įxamples: "You're saying." "You feel that." "If I understand you, you feel this way about this situation." "You say you feel _, but you seem _ when talking about this." The listener waits until the speaker pauses, as if expecting some sort of response from the listener. These statements convey interest and keep the person talking.Įxamples: "Tell me more." "That sounds interesting." "When did it happen." This is often the way to sense how someone is really feeling. Pay attention to the speaker's body language and facial expressions.Remind yourself that you're there to be the listener, not offer your opinion. Set aside your own feelings and prejudices.Find a quiet space where you can avoid distraction. Focus your attention on the speaker and the topic.Follow these tips to become a more active listener:
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